Dear Woman

You see, while the original plan is to see that both complete the other, it does not mean that the whole life of one should revolve around the other. At least, before the coming together, there was life and coming together should not stop life individually but strengthen it.

Dear woman

Dear woman, it is such a pleasure to write to you. Women are such a wonderful godly creature empowered to make exploits but often times, limited even by themselves because they tend to build their world around a wrong source. One of my big sisters would always say that most problem a woman go through is connected to one man somewhere. A man that was in her life, presently in her life or would soon walk into her life. It then becomes a pity because somehow, as strong and empowered as most women are, they still believe that a man makes their world complete. Needless to say, that, even some of the very strong independent ones also start building their world around men when they finally let their guards down.

Then, the questions would be; is it wrong to let a man into your space? Since when does loving a man and selflessly supporting a man becomes a crime? What does relationship (whatever type) with a man translate to, for a man, and for a woman? Women and men are wired differently, hence the thought and process method differs. While a woman can almost loose herself in the process of trying to be there for him, thus, sacrificing so many things in the process just to ensure that her man is very much okay, a man doesn’t even see much of that because that his brain processes things differently.

I know you’re probably wondering if I am trying to say that men are insensitive or unloving, not at all. They are very loving but you see, they interpret their love in a different way. Unlike women, men are not wired to do so many things or process so many things at the same time. So, their energy is focused on one thing at a time. And if you are lucky to find yourself a very hardworking man, then you’re in for it. Then, the next question would be, has it become a crime to love a very hardworking man? On the contrary, it is the best as long as you can make the best of the situation.

A hardworking man is mostly a workaholic and builds his world around his job/work as the case may be.  So, for most of his time, he dedicates it to his job. Whenever he can, he makes time for his family and tries to make up. Often times, his woman may not even understand this process. Hence, she will keep complaining of lack of attention, especially if unconsciously she has built her world around him. The woman on the other hand, would be just fine if she focused less on him in terms of dependence and got actively engaged with other aspects of her life.

You see, while the original plan is to see that both complete the other, it does not mean that the whole life of one should revolve around the other. At least, before the coming together, there was life and coming together should not stop life individually but strengthen it. Let me say that doing nothing before getting entangled to a man would only make your life more miserable than it was before your coming together. Your man before marriage does not owe you any fulfilment of obligation or responsibilities. He may choose to do it, but he is not obligated to do it. Understand this, and you’re one step happier.

Also, that you’re married does not automatically mean he becomes your burden bearer. What truly makes a man happy is not even marriage but sense of fulfilment and placement in his place of work or job. Primarily, a hardworking man’s life revolves around his job. So, even marriage cannot change that over the night. Depending on the nature of his job/work, if he’ll be able to balance both, as a woman you have a role to play. Remember, the thought process differs so complaints won’t even do it. So, get yourself together and get involved both in his job/work and also something that makes you happy.

Getting busy will not only help you but it will keep your mind of several thoughts that may not even be true in the first place. Remember, an idle mind is the devil’s workshop. First, with full understanding that a woman is a home builder, you know that the destiny of the home rests on your shoulder. Can you carry it alone and not get weary? Big question if you ask me. But in reality, you can’t. No woman can and that’s because despite the abilities and strong will you may possess; you will definitely get weary at some point. The weight on your shoulder determines how early you get weary. So, you need help! In fact, every woman needs help. I am not talking about physical help now because physical helps can get exhausted too.

You see, whoever will go far in life needs a divine backing. Every successful person in the world has some sort of a spiritual backing. It could either be from God or from the devil. And most times, you can always tell the difference. So, I’m guessing you already can tell which help is of greater good for you. I don’t know about you but if I’ll advise you, I’d say you should extend a hand of invitation to God. He is the surest help you can get.

When it gets dicey, rough, rosy, and even clumsy, with this help, you know what exactly to do at every point in time. You have the right response to every situation; you know the right reaction for every action. You know when to pray instead of a dialogue, you know when to smile instead of a response. As a matter of fact, you become a mystery your man wants to unravel because you balance it all and make the home a safe haven.

Would you rather seek this help? Or would you keep trying to figure things out yourself? Well, if you have made up your mind to seek this help, congratulations to you! Just say these words of faith and watch what happens next to your life and home.

Dear Jesus, I accept that I am helpless and I need the surest help. Please, come and be my guide from now henceforth. I don’t want to struggle to figure out anything. Please, come be my backup so I can function in the capacity of a home builder as you have called me. So, help me Lord.

Well, there you go! Your help is here! I’d love to read your thoughts on this in the comment section.

Author: Abigael Ibikunle

I am a lover of people and nature.. A passionate educator who enjoys public speaking. A writer whose writing can be triggered by any and everything... Abigaelibikunle@gmail.com

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